The year was 1975, and while other little girls were busy styling their Barbie dolls and wobbling their Weebles, Pete Barma was obsessed with playing baseball with all the boys in her cul-de-sac. The memories from the summer when she was eight inspired Barma and her wife, Bret Parker, to create their original animated short film, Pete.
Playing ball
"The stories of my life are just one part of me, but this one in particular, in the time we were in, it just felt really important," Barma said as she recalled the real-life events depicted in the film, which takes a look at the experiences of a Queer kid back in the 1970s, when ideas around gender expression and sexuality were different.
The movie follows eight-year-old Pete, a kid determined to play baseball with her friends. When she was sporting a short haircut and the traditional uniform, the parents didn't have a problem with Pete playing on the team, especially not when she was scoring runs. However, once some realized Pete was not another little boy, the trouble began.
Even though Pete is set nearly 50 years ago, the theme at the heart of the film still rings true for young athletes, especially Trans athletes, today.
One of the points fans have praised Pete for hitting is that children are often much more accepting than we give them credit for. "What always resonated with me growing up, and even now [is that] kids are just rarely the problem," Barma said.
Relating to the Trans community
While Barma uses she/her pronouns, she also recognizes that her story is one that many gender-diverse viewers have resonated with.
"That's any one person's journey. It's a personal journey. My journey probably would have been very different if I was born in 1997 or 2005. I'm not sure where that... would have taken me. It's upsetting to me when people are so angry about someone's journey that has no impact on their life. It's hard enough coming out today as Queer. It still comes with many challenges and risks, and then you add this layer, this visceral hatred spreading around. That's why we picked this one," she continued.
Before Pete premiered, Barma had some concerns that members of the LGBTQ+ community might take offense at her story because of her gender identity, which she admits reflects the world she grew up in.
"You don't know until it's out there what people will think. I had some reservations about it. I worried people might be mad that I still identify as she/her. That was my journey, but I think it's important.
"Everybody's been super supportive [though]. I think that people who do identify as Trans or Nonbinary understand that it is everybody's journey. It's not one for someone else to make or decide. It's been a wonderful reception," she said.
"Even today, even though I identify as she/her, it still was a journey I took. It was a journey I took to get here, and it might have been different at different times, but it was the one I took in the time I lived in. It didn't come without challenges."
Trailblazing mom
Pete is a love letter to anyone who is or was a Queer kid. But for many viewers, Barma's mother is the real hero of the story, for defending her kid. When Barma looks back on the events of Pete, she realizes her mom was a trailblazer in her own right.
"Having my mom still alive — she just turned 82 last weekend — at a film festival, seeing herself, it's pretty cool," she said. "She thinks she's a star."
Barma's mother, who voiced her character in the film, also contributed to the storytelling process. Through interviews, Parker and Barma learned a lot more about the situation, which young Pete had been shielded from at the time.
"To be honest with you, there were things I didn't know about the story," Barma said. "She kept me away from what had happened in the stands. She shielded me a bit. It was when we were interviewing her and doing her voicework that the memories came flooding out. She was able to tell it. I was like, 'Wow, they were really that mad?' And she said, 'Yeah, they were pretty angry.' Some of them made their kids quit."
While the film is pretty accurate to the real-life events Barma and her mother experienced, it did change some facts, much to her mother's disappointment.
"There are some loose interpretations. We used my father's car [in the film] instead of my mom's car. That bothers her. She says, 'I would have never driven your father's car,' but I'm like, 'Mom, it was a cuter car for a cartoon.'"
Super lucky
Barma has noticed that when the film shows at festivals, Queer and Trans audiences have a different reaction to it than their cis-het counterparts.
"It's interesting when we show this to Queer audiences or predominantly straight audiences, depending on the film festival. Straight audiences look at the child. They empathize with the child, and Queer audiences applaud the mom. It's a very different reaction, and it makes me sad a little bit still, because it tells me that not everyone has that support yet."
The reaction Queer viewers have to Pete's mom in the film has only reinforced what Barma has known her whole life.
"My parents were ridiculous. They were so amazing. I don't think you know it when you're in it. It takes reflection now as an adult. Today I'm like, 'Holy crap!' My folks supported me at anything I wanted to do, any endeavor, any haircut, any look, anybody I brought home to meet them. I used to refuse to say I was lucky, because parents are supposed to be like that, but I've grown up. Now I can admit I was super lucky."
"My mom and my father, both, are very different people. My mom is much more active. My dad was a much more shy man," she said as she remembered her childhood. "...I still did the formal coming out..., but then my dad was like, 'Are you hungry?' and my mom was like, 'We knew, it's no surprise.'
"Growing up, I think why my journey, when I was so little, was so simple [was] because kids are awesome, and my parents were like, 'Do what you want to do.'"
A lesson in vulnerability
Sharing the final product with friends and family was difficult for Barma.
"It was insane! It's a way more vulnerable feeling than I had anticipated. We'd watched it a lot on a computer screen, and even that brings tears to my eyes," she said.
"There are two aspects of vulnerability, because you never know how someone will receive something. It's your life. That adds another layer of 'oh my gosh, what if they don't like it?' ...[Between] strangers and family, I don't know which was harder. I think having people you know see it was more difficult, more nerve-racking. I'm past that now [though]. It seems to be going okay."
Despite the nerves, Barma's friends and family, especially her mom, are proud of the movie. The pride they always had for her is one of the reasons Barma felt like she could share her story with the world.
Pete's epilogue
For those who wonder what happened next for the little kid in the cartoon, Pete continued her love affair with baseball until it eventually led to another passion.
"I played ball, and as it turns out, that theme held for the rest of my life," Barma said. "I played through college. At first, I got an education degree, because it seemed like something that might include sports.
"When I first started teaching, it turned out I was a horrible coach. Not all things translate to the other side of the field. I wasn't very good at it, but I fell in love with teaching. I am just really good with kids. That stuck, and I fell in love with working with kids."
Through teaching, Barma next found a passion for storytelling, she said. "I've always been a literature teacher. ...Teaching literature was also kind of an accident. I was supposed to be an elementary school teacher but ended up being a high school teacher. Storytelling is such a big part of the curriculum, not just with the subject matter but trying to keep the kids' interest. I think I perfected this art of ...oral storytelling. I'm just super interested in the world around me and making people laugh, things of that nature."
It was a shared passion for storytelling that inspired Barma and her wife to work on an original film project.
"Our first film was about ...the first Gay bar in the US with open windows to the public, back in '72," Barma said. "I was so fascinated by the people's stories, the sitting customers going there. That was my first inspiration. I thought some stories need to be told. Especially in the LGBTQ+ community,... historically, they're lost. A lot of people don't have family, or community is [something] I just identified. That became the inspiration more than anything."
Telling LGBTQ+ stories
Barma realized she, like many LGBTQ+ people, had stories to tell the world, too.
Once Parker and Barma decided to create another film project, this one an animated short, they got to work. They quickly learned that animation and documentary filmmaking are vastly different beasts.
"My wife, Bret, who is the director, is an animator. She's been an animator for about 26 years. Her dream was to direct an animated piece... [Pete is about] the past, so it just lent itself to be an animated tale."
Barma admits she had an easier job when it came to completing this film. "The difficulty was in Bret's hands as the director," Barma explained. "...We did this in people's spare time. We had to get friends and strangers — people we had never met, during COVID — to volunteer after work.
"...[We] also ...were trying to ...make it look more 1970s, like Winnie the Pooh-ish, like having that watercolor vibe. So that was a huge technical challenge for Bret."
"Nothing would get made without Bret. I'm the art of storytelling and relaxation, and Bret is the workhorse in the family," Barma added with a laugh. "It ended up being narrated by myself, which was hard, even though there were not many words. I just cried every single time. I'm not very good at saying words and not crying at the same time."
More Pete?
The final draft came out beautifully. Pete has now been featured as an official selection at the Tribeca Film Festival and the Orlando Film Festival. Their success has inspired Barma and Parker to think about future projects, too.
"We are in some conversations, but I can't talk much about that now," Barma said. "So far it's about where Pete as a single entity goes. Hopefully, you'll see it sometime around Pride. I am 100% hoping that larger audiences fall in love with it and kids like it, so we can write some more.
"We have about seven little Petes in the making. We're excited about that. Pete doesn't always stay seven years old. Maybe with that arc, people can start to understand that Queers grow up and become grown-up Queers, that they don't just stop when they're little... That would be our goal, and to have Bret at the helm directing it — I think she's amazing."
Barma has more childhood stories to share with the world. "There might be a story down the line where my mom feels the influence of society, where she wants to put me in a dress because other people are starting to influence her, but it [doesn't] last," she said.
"She had that age-old concern of 'What's the world going to do to me if I don't fit in?' She had missteps in my life, but it was mostly about what the world would do to me, not about their opinions. It was more about the unknown world and what cruelties could be unleashed."
Ultimately, Barma and Parker hope to create more art to inspire people to see the world more like children do.
"If we left things to kids, man, we would have a much better world," she said. "I hope [audiences] take away a big question, like: Why am I so mad at this? Why am I so angry at something that is just a kid, or a grown-up, or somebody just living their life?
"I hope it [gives people] pause. I hope, more than anything, it causes change, but on the way to change, there has to be a pause. There has to be a reflection. What is it? What is it that you're mad about? What is it that you can't wrap your head around? I'm well aware of it. I live in San Francisco now, and I have these great kids who couldn't care less, and a wonderful family in the community of Orlando. It will forever dumbfound me as to the why. If someone can reflect on that, I'm down."
Pete is a film for anyone who has ever wanted to exist in a space they weren't supposed to. The film is a celebration of Queer and Trans kids, the allies who accept them, and the parents who should always fight for them. Now, more than ever, it is an important reminder that all kids deserve to play.