On Saturday, June 11, Queers from all across Seattle lined the block outside Kremwerk. While it not yet been officially documented, rumor has it the crowd that gathered that night may have been the Gayest audience in town. LGBTQs young and slightly older all came out of the woodwork to witness the special Pride edition of The Queer Agenda, Nam Nam Production's live Queer dating show, created by local celebrity power couple Stephanie Nam and Jalesa Johnson (who met at a different live dating show Stephanie was producing).
The couple hosted the night and warmed up the crowd with some hilarious improvised and unscripted bits. Once the audience was feeling loose, Nam and Johnson introducing the stars of the show, the contestants they had hand-selected, hoping that some would leave the stage with a new romantic partner.
Meeting the contestants
First to introduce themselves to the audience was Caitlyn Glinski, a massage therapist and self-described "sad cowboy." Johnson informed the audience that Glinski's sun sign is Gemini, which means they are usually bad at making decisions. To prove Johnson wrong, they agreed to a quick round of "FMK," choosing between three classic Geminis: Edward Cullen, Draco Malfoy, and Arthur, from the children's cartoon Arthur.
Next to the stage was another Seattle-based comedian, Jessa White, who said her ideal person was someone who "wants to fuck her" and who she also "wants to fuck." When Nam asked White what she was looking for that night, she replied, "an orgasm before midnight."
Following White was crowd favorite Juno Men. Men is also a Seattle comedian and producer and said she was hoping to make a connection, either platonically or, if the energy was right, romantically. She said her ideal partner has "wit, intelligence, kindness, and an affinity for KBBQ."
The next contestant to join the show was Aviona Gaines, an SEL (social-emotional learning) specialist who describes herself as someone "who asks too many questions." Among her listed hobbies, Gaines said she enjoys "reframing things," to which Johnson asked what her favorite type of frame was. After a moment of mild confusion, Gaines explained her hobby is positively reframing ideas, not objects.
After Gaines charmed the crowd, the youngest contestant on the show strutted their way onto the stage. Monty Rozema is a comic-bookstore employee and teaching artist. Rozema said they enjoy scrapbooking, roller skating, reading, and Pinterest. "I take Pinterest very seriously," they said. Per Rozema's request, Johnson improvised a round of comic book-inspired "FMK." The winner? Frozone.
The final contestant to make his way to the stage was Jonathan Dale Logerstedt, or as Nam liked to say, "our token male." Logerstedt said his ideal partner was someone who enjoys "lots of kinky Queer sex," to which the audience whooped and applauded.
Each of the contestants on The Queer Agenda identified as some sort of Queer, and all were open to dating people of any gender, although a few did admit they have preferences.
Let the games begin
Once the contestants finished introducing themselves, it was time to start the games. Nam and Johnson began the night with a few light rounds of "Would You Rather," handing each contestant two cards to hold up to signify their preference on topics like "camping or parties," "weed or alcohol," and "monogamy or open relationship."
Next, Johnson and Nam read off questions the contestants had anonymously submitted to them before the show. They probed each participant with the questions, which varied in depth and spice.
Once the contestants explained a little bit more about their preferences, Johnson and Nam spiced things up with a game of squirtable pick-up lines. The hosts paired off the contestants, had them sit in front of the audience, and made them read cringe pick-up lines to each other. If they could get their partner to break into a laugh with their delivery, the pick-up artist was allowed to squirt them with a small water gun. The game was a hit with the crowd.
After all the fun, chaos, and even a little lap-dancing between contestants, it was time for the moment everyone had been waiting for. Nam passed out notebooks to each of the contestants and asked them to write down the name of the person they felt the best connection with. Secretively, each contestant looked around and scrawled out a name.
Nam and Johnson then pulled out a wildcard: they asked all the singles to announce aloud the person they had chosen. Awkwardness ensued as each contestant slowly came forward to declare who their night's crush had been. The show's star seemed to be Gaines, who attracted not one but two requests for a second date. "What are you doing before midnight?" White asked her, followed by uproarious applause.
Men also proved to be a popular option, with an offer for a friend date, a something-more date, and even an admirer in the crowd asking if she would go out with them.
The night ended on a high, with all the contestants laughing and fending off the horny Queers in the audience looking to scoop up a chance for a date with one of the hot stars of the show.
Nam and Johnson proudly closed out the night, deeming the show the Queerest edition of The Queer Agenda yet. They also informed the room that if any single Queers out there are looking to sign up to be on the next live dating show, another round will be happening in August. A link to apply for a position on the show can be found on Nam's website at https://www.stephanienam.com/productions.
The Queer Agenda brings laughs and love to a live audience
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