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Fun with my honey and Halloween suggestions

by Rajkhet Dirzhud-Rashid - SGN A&E Writer

Since this one had already finished the last Lipstick and Lust (that I hope you enjoyed!), I couldn't mention that the lovely WiFi cafe where this one internets (now that my home computer is dead and gone - paging Bill Gates, a donation of one, please?) had a run-in with a nutty robber. Me, I can't see why someone would rob these sweet folks, or what they could possibly get out of a place that is mostly populated with students and geeks on computers and only sells beverages and pastries. Just hope they catch that rat before he does it again. And shame on him for scaring my fave baristas.

On a happier note, this one finally got to meet the whole extended family of my sweetie/slave at a celebration recently, and honey, though I was hella nervous, everything went swimmingly. I even found out I'd lost three pounds when I did my weekly swim workout last Sunday, and this after pigging out on some of the best food to cross these lips in a queen's age. Dieting is a good thing, especially since I'm not starving myself - just eating healthy - but birthday cake is something I could not and did not pass up, my little pumpkins.

Oh, and after that big gathering, me and my honey bunny came back to The Digs and got busy so much, this one nearly fell on the floor from having my bell rang so many times! Yeah, we're set for life, me and my darling one, indeed we are.

We also boogied like wild thangs at the Mercury last Friday before the big family shindig, and did some sexy things that I'm sure shocked some of the more serious goth regulars. Nothing like a real scene in progress to get eyebrows raised, honey, let me tell ya. And, babies, we both looked gawgeous, especially my darling one in grrl drag, showing a little leg. We're definitely going out dancing again, maybe swing dancing in the near future.

And to the sweet androgyne in the glittery pants, honey, to us you were "Mr. Mercury" that night, so keep up the being fabulous no matter who gets snooty with you. Nice high heel boots, too, baby.

So, what else has this little kitty been up to besides dancing the night away, meeting my loved one's family and traveling on overcrowded buses with sometimes-mean drivers? Well, my sweetie and I continue to train at the Divine Ms. Shima (check out the phone number for Way Of Life Wellness Center in the last L&L) and get all cleared out of negative energy, and I've been enjoying watching Being Erica on the Canadian station. Good Lesbian and Gay plotlines and writing that doesn't insult my intelligence. Check it out.

Also loving my workout, especially Zumba, but what I really love is the new pistachio commercial featuring a dominatrix (though last I looked, it wasn't on late at night with the other "get cracking" examples on the ad, making me wonder if they've pulled it, and darn it if they have).

Also, this one and her sweetie tried out some hot cider at Cowgirls Espresso in Renton (the Benson Plaza one) and checked out two dishy babes who were serving us and told them we definitely don't mind them being in bikinis while they're giving us our fix of hot things to drink. Shame on those ladies in Everett who are now trying to pressure their city council into making it a "lewd act" for their bikini baristas to stay that way. I say, you folks could think of how Everett's practically the murder capitol of the Northwest as something really lewd and focus on doing something about that, rather than harass some scantily clad baristas. True, if crime is being committed, do something about that, but them wearing next to nothing being lewd? Honey, get over it already!

Now for the part you like about this column, where I tell you what I've enjoyed and what I recommend. First, let me just say, Macy's, I would write about you like I constantly do about Sephora (my fave place to treat myself to new makeup and get honeybunny makeovers in her grrl drag) and Nordstrom, but hey, when you refuse to give me a sample to write about, and are snooty to boot, I'm not feelin' the love, ya know? Maybe chill out and just hand out a few samples and you'll get in on the splendor that is being praised by myself, hmmm? Yessiree.

For now, I highly recommend Herbal Essences Body Envy Volumizing Shampoo and conditioner and mousse. I tried some of each on sweetie and tried the shampoo and conditioner on my dreads, and both times was very pleased with the results - I love how sweetie's hair smells now, too. Pick this up at either Walgreens or Safeway (where we went shopping recently and felt like the most romantic couple in the world). Also, if you haven't already gotten your Halloween makeup yet, hike on by Metro on Broadway and pick up some of the Detailz eyeliner in the yummiest colors (the silver is now one of my go-to colors, as is the pencil liner in a russet red) to wear with black liner to make these eyes pop, babies. Put the silver on your lashes and hey, you are too hot to handle.

Okay, so that's it for now, and to those folks who fired the model for being "too fat" after Photoshopping her body into a shape that resembled something alien, shame, shame, shame. Also, what the hell was the deal last Sunday with the street cleaning crew steamwashing and power washing the sidewalk so that folks waiting for the bus were blasted by whatever toxic crap they were using? That's my taxpayer dollars at work? Then, honey, we need a change in leadership in "rat city" if you ask me. And this after a week of rain, no less. Silliness and more silliness to this one's mind.

Have a safe and happy Halloween, babies, and remember this one is still looking to do someone's Halloween party as their delightfully charming and accurate Tarot reader, so do e-mail me at ijanaral@yahoo.com if you're interested, eh? Be more tolerant, stop trashing our planet, visualize more positive energy everywhere and a functional healthcare system and an economy where everyone has a home, not just the folks who might pay over a million dollars for those new condos downtown - though who those folks might be, this one has no idea. Kiss kiss, peace out, buhbye!

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