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Friday, Sep 20, 2019
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Grammy wrap-up and Coldplay tour date
by Albert Rodriguez - SGN A&E Writer

If you missed last weekend's Grammy Awards - viewed by 19.1 million people in the US alone - allow me to provide you with some highlights from the grand telecast by presenting my own tokens of recognition.

Best in show: Jennifer Hudson
Not only did Jennifer Hudson win her first Grammy Award, she also brought the house down with a powerful rendition of "You Pulled Me Through" backed by a full gospel choir. From heaven to earth, a much-deserved standing ovation was bestowed to the young, beautiful diva. You set that Grammy next to your Oscar, girl!

Best in show, runner-up: Radiohead
Atmospheric, experimental, wildly odd, yet brilliant is what we've come to expect from Radiohead, and they delivered it on a performance of "15 Steps" surrounded by the USC Marching Band. They should've been the ceremony's opening act, though.

Worst in show: U2
I love Bono and the gang, but their new song about boots and whatever else was a total bore, and they had no business even playing on the Grammy telecast without a single nomination.

Sounds like teen vomit award: Taylor Swift and Miley Cyrus
As adorable as they are individually, these tween superstars were dreadful as a duet - reminding me of tryouts for my grade school talent show.

Best surprise: Whitney Houston
I'm not sure if she smoked a bowl on the red carpet with Lil Wayne, but Whitney Houston was in a galaxy far, far away from Staples Center when she presented the first award on the telecast. That said, my jaw fell to the floor when she appeared onstage because even though she's got a serious case of the wacky doodles, she's still Whitney fucking Houston!

Hottest hottie: Caleb Followill
This Southern devil, lead singer of rock band Kings of Leon, who won their first Grammy on Sunday evening, was vertical dessert in a button-down suit - whipped cream not needed.

Stupidest collaboration: Stevie Wonder and Jonas Brothers
Will someone please tell Stevie Wonder that Jonas Brothers are three white, suburban kids burped from the Disney channel with the soul equivalent of a country club membership?

Best fruity performance: Katy Perry
What's not to love about a chick who descends from a golden-glittered banana?

Baddest hair day award: Kanye West
If there're two things that don't go together, they're hip-hop and mullets.

I'm still kicking award: Neil Diamond
While he sounded out of synch during his run-through of "Sweet Caroline," Diamond proved that age is nothing but a number - even if that number is 68.

Bubblegum pop award: Adele
When an accepting a major award, such as Best New Artist, lose the chewing gum, honey.

Roadkill image award: Travis Barker
He nearly met Jesus when his plane went down last year, but combing his hair or washing it - at the very least - would've looked more presentable when handing an award to Coldplay, who looked as if they plucked their costumes from Captain Kangaroo's dressing room.

And speaking of Coldplay (who, despite wearing Easter egg-colored jackets to the ceremony, added three more Grammys to their collection and now own seven), just before the big awards show, the British quartet announced a summer leg of North American tour dates that includes an appearance at The Gorge on July 11. Tickets go on sale tomorrow (10 a.m.) at all Ticketmaster locations, although exact prices weren't available at press time. The melodramatic rock group has been on the road for much of the past eight months, yet has not performed anywhere in the Northwest with the exception of a headlining slot at last summer's Pemberton Festival. Thus, a road trip to The Gorge this summer is sounding like a great idea.

Finally, warm wishes to Rihanna as she heals from injuries stemming from an alleged domestic violence assault. We look forward to seeing her back on her feet, minus the asshole boyfriend, in the coming weeks.
picture: Jennifer Hudson
 

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